Interview with an IVF Patient

 What Led You to Consider IVF as a Fertility Treatment?

After trying to conceive for five years without success, I felt defeated. I tried everything—tracking my cycle, monitoring ovulation, and following all the advice I could find. Still, nothing worked. Before IVF, I went through multiple rounds of IUI, but those also failed. It was a close friend who suggested I look into IVF. I decided to consult a doctor, and although the first two cycles didn’t work, I finally conceived during the third attempt. 

How Did You Prepare Yourself Emotionally and Physically Before Starting the IVF Treatment?

Going into IVF wasn’t easy because I had already been through so much with IUIs and tracking ovulation every month. It was emotionally exhausting—every month brought new hope, only to end in disappointment. Physically, I did my best to stay healthy. I focused on good nutrition, keeping my protein levels in check, and maintaining a balanced diet. But honestly, the whole process was draining. It felt like I was always on edge, waiting for the perfect moment that never seemed to come. And in an Indian household, where this topic is still somewhat taboo, it’s hard to find someone who really understands what you’re going through.

What Was the Most Challenging Part of Undergoing IVF?

The hardest part was navigating the emotional, physical, and social challenges all at once. Convincing my husband and in-laws to go forward with IVF was tough, especially since it’s such a significant financial and emotional commitment. On top of that, the physical side of it was incredibly painful. The hormone injections, the egg retrieval process—it was all overwhelming. During my third cycle, I developed ascites due to low protein levels, which caused severe fluid buildup in my abdomen. I had to have the fluid drained regularly, and there was even a point when my doctor considered terminating the pregnancy for my health. Thankfully, we got through it, but the fear and uncertainty were constantly there.

Did You Experience Any Side Effects From the Fertility Medications?

Yes, I did. During my third cycle, I developed ascites, which was likely linked to my low protein levels. The fluid buildup in my abdomen was severe, and my urine output dropped so much that even diuretics didn’t work at first. My doctor eventually drained about 18 liters of fluid over time. It was terrifying and exhausting. Looking back, I wish I had known about the option of a frozen cycle, which could have allowed my body to recover between egg retrieval and embryo transfer. It might have made the experience a bit easier.

How Did IVF Impact Your Daily Life During the Treatment?

It completely took over my life. I was so focused on making it work that everything else felt secondary. Emotionally, I was drained. I often felt alone because it’s hard for others to truly understand what you’re going through. There were times when even my closest relationships felt strained. I would sometimes attend treatment sessions alone because I didn’t want to deal with the added stress of explaining myself or trying to find support that wasn’t always there. It was a lonely and exhausting journey.

How Did You Cope With the Emotional Ups and Downs of Waiting for the Results During the Process?

The waiting period was excruciating. I tried to keep myself busy with small routines and focused on taking things one day at a time. Honestly, there were moments when I just let myself cry—it was a way to release the pressure. Holding onto hope, even when it felt impossible, was the only thing that kept me going.

Did You Seek Any Counseling or Emotional Support During Your IVF Journey?

I didn’t, but looking back, I wish I had. IVF is such an emotionally stressful process, and I think having someone to talk to—someone objective who could help me navigate my emotions—would have made a big difference. If anyone asked me for advice, I’d tell them to seriously consider counseling. Just having someone to listen and help you find your way forward can make all the difference.

How Did You Handle the Stress or Anxiety of Financial Costs Regarding IVF?

Thankfully, we were in a position where finances weren’t the biggest hurdle. That said, IVF is expensive, and we made sure to plan our expenses carefully. Consulting a financial advisor was helpful for us, and I think it’s something anyone considering IVF should do. Even if you can afford it, the costs can add up quickly, so having a plan is important.

Since You Had Multiple IVF Cycles, How Did Each Cycle Differ in Terms of Your Experience?

The first two cycles were emotionally draining but didn’t come with major physical complications. My third cycle, however, was a different story. That’s when I developed the protein deficiency and ascites. It was the most challenging but also the most rewarding because it led to my first pregnancy. For my second child, I chose a frozen cycle, and it made such a difference. By allowing my body to recover between egg retrieval and embryo transfer, the process felt much more manageable. Combining that with advancements like ICSI made the experience smoother and less stressful.

Since Your First Two IVF Cycles Were Unsuccessful, How Did You Find the Strength to Keep Trying?

Honestly, it was my desire to have a child that kept me going. I wanted it so badly that I couldn’t imagine giving up. There was also societal pressure—seeing others my age with kids and feeling the unspoken expectations from family and society. In Indian culture, having children is often seen as essential, and while that pressure can be overwhelming, it also gave me the determination to keep trying until I had exhausted every option.

Did You Feel Pressure or Judgment From Society for Pursuing IVF?

Yes, absolutely. At the time, IVF wasn’t very common in India, and people often had to travel abroad for treatment. There’s also a stigma surrounding infertility. People don’t openly acknowledge it, but the pressure to have children—to continue the family lineage—is very real. Back then, it was even harder for men to accept the possibility of male infertility. Things have improved a lot over the years, but there’s still a long way to go, especially in rural areas where these topics remain taboo. However, I am glad to see IVF becoming more common and less stigmatised.